Sunday, October 26, 2008

The Families' Thoughts - Crime Aid

Once again the members of the other 4 families of the Scranton Business Park have convened to discuss the activities over at Dunder Mifflin. We are joined by Bob Vance of Vance Refrigeration, Paul "Cool Guy" Faust of Disaster Kits Limited, W.B. Jones of W.B. Jones Heating and Cooling and Bill Cress of Cress Tool and Dye.

So, without further ado, we present the thoughts of the men who run the Scranton Business Park, sent in directly from them about the "Crime Aid" episode.

Cool Guy Paul's Cool Thoughts: Its simple…..preparedness is an all encompassing concept. I have been telling the knuckleheads at Dunder Mifflin to wake up and be more prepared. Disasters aren’t just hurricanes, wildfires, giant lava flows, infestations of locusts or blackouts…..they include break-ins, car thefts and the not so uncommon stolen identity (although…I can’t think of one person who would want to steal any of their identities). I simply can’t feel bad for them as they have ignored my expert and highly sought after advise.

W.B. Jones' Grade A Badass Review: Once again we've gotten further reinforcement that the only real class acts at Dunder Mifflin are Phyllis and the blues playing guard. That whole auction thing by Michael was a complete bust until my buddy Bob Vance stepped up for that thousand dollar hug from his own Million Dollar Baby! If I had been invited it would have cost him far, far more !!

Cress' Convo: Michael and Holly are having office sex? Fine. Michael and Holly are having Office Park sex? I am not cleaning up after that.

Vance's View: Q: Who is dumb enough to leave the SBP unlocked while fornicating in the stairwell? A: Michael Scott. Q: Who holds an auction, but does not actually possess the item up for auction? A: Michael Scott. Q: Who knows that there is no monetary value that can be placed on a Phyllis hug? A: Bob Vance, Vance Refrigeration. Never doubt for a moment that if you try to get in a bidding war with BV-VR, that he will whip out the big-boy wad that lives in his pocket and beat you silly with it. Q: Who is the BOSS? A: BRUUU-UUUCE! And that would be because: "TRAMPS LIKE US, BABY, WE WERE BORN TO RUN..."

As always we have to thank the men BEHIND the men behind Scranton - Bobby Ray Shafer (Bob Vance), Paul Faust (Cool Guy Paul), Barry Sigismondi (W.B. Jones) and Terrence Beasor (Bill Cress) for their amazing willingness to share with us and all the Dunderheads out there!

1 comment:

  1. Oh, you boys make me laugh - I love popping over here to get a different perspective on the weeks events at DM Scranton :O)