Monday, November 10, 2008

The Families' Thoughts - Customer Survey

Once again the members of the other 4 families of the Scranton Business Park have convened to discuss the activities over at Dunder Mifflin. We are joined by Bob Vance of Vance Refrigeration, Paul "Cool Guy" Faust of Disaster Kits Limited, W.B. Jones of W.B. Jones Heating and Cooling and Bill Cress of Cress Tool and Dye.

So, without further ado, we present the thoughts of the men who run the Scranton Business Park, sent in directly from them about the "Customer Survey" episode.

Cress' Convo: Kelly is a venomous, slithering cobra just waiting to strike if you wrong her. Good for her, my kind of cobr.... uh..... woman. I like her.

Vance's View: At VANCE REFRIGERATION, Customer Satisfaction is JOB #1. It's something we take very seriously -- unlike some of our fellow tenants here at SBP. Of course this only confirms an earlier memo that I sent to all V-R employees warning them to steer clear of the wily Kelly Kapoor. I've seen her in action and I know TROUBLE when I see it.(Kelly cornered me one time and did a ten minute monologue on Paris Hilton that I'm still trying to forget!) There are certainly some "dusky" do's-and-don'ts at play here, and I'm reminded of some of Bob Vance's old adventures in The 'Nam, but that's another story for another time. Stop by this week for our big sale and I'll give you a CUSTOMER SURVEY that you won't soon forget.
Yours in refrigeration,

Cool Guy Paul's Cool Thoughts: This week has been rather hectic as I am only a one man operation and have been dealing with Hurricane Paloma. However….after watching the way the employees of Dunder Mifflin backstab each other I cant see how they stay in business long. I may expand my company and have already spoken to the landlord about taking over their space. I did however have the time to tap into Jim’s new Bluetooth… should hear what him and Pam talk about in private!!!!

W.B. Jones' Grade A Badass Review: "You juked the stats cupcake". How can you run a successful enterprise when you can't depend on the accuracy of customer surveys ?? It seems that Dunder Mifflin runs via an informal, personal vendetta performance system, where reprisals are the mainstay of the work day. You would think Michael Scott could get his act together and stamp out this corruption once and for all. On a sadder note, I really feel like my good friend Andy is being led down the proverbial path buy his unscrupulous fiance and her malevolent gigolo - unconscionable !

As always we have to thank the men BEHIND the men behind Scranton - Bobby Ray Shafer (Bob Vance), Paul Faust (Cool Guy Paul), Barry Sigismondi (W.B. Jones) and Terrence Beasor (Bill Cress) for their amazing willingness to share with us and all the Dunderheads out there!

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